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School Climate & Safety

Student Pronoun Policies Put Teachers in a Tough Spot

By Elizabeth Heubeck 鈥 July 23, 2024 5 min read
Parents, students, and staff of Chino Valley Unified School District hold up flags and signs in favor of protecting LGBTQ+ policies at the school board meeting held at Don Antonio Lugo High School on June 15, 2023, in Chino, Calif.
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Consider the following scenarios: A student asks a teacher to refer to them by a different pronoun or name in class. A teacher overhears a student telling a friend plans to start using different pronouns. Or a student shares privately with a teacher the desire to change genders, requesting confidentiality.

In each of these circumstances, a teacher in the Anderson Union high school district in Anderson, Calif., has 72 hours to call, email, or otherwise share this information with the student鈥檚 parents.

The policy鈥攕imilar to those in districts across the country鈥攊s at the center of an emerging legal battle. California Gov. Gavin Newsom, a Democrat, signed into law last week a bill prohibiting schools from requiring educators to inform parents if a student requests to use a different name or pronouns in school than the ones assigned at birth. Two days later, Jackie Labarbera, the president of the Anderson Union school board, announced on that the district would not comply.

Other districts in the state have similar parental disclosure policies, and the Chino Valley Unified school district in Southern California , which takes effect Jan. 1, violates parents鈥 constitutional rights.

Parents in a handful of states have also sued school districts over gender-related policies, claiming their 14th Amendment rights are violated when schools fail to inform them that their children have changed their pronouns or names.

At least a half-dozen states have laws that require teachers or administrators to tell parents if their child requests to use a different name or pronouns that differ from the sex assigned at birth.

Teachers are caught in the middle as they navigate the sensitive issue of how to respond in a responsible manner to the growing number of students who are coming out in school as transgender or nonbinary. They have to balance state and local policies alongside their own personal ethics and weigh the trust of their students against their responsibility to parents鈥攁ll with little to no training or guidance.

Teachers fear potential job repercussions

Education Week reached out to teachers鈥 unions in three states that have enacted 鈥渕andatory disclosure laws鈥 to get their reactions to these policies, but most requests went unanswered. A spokesperson from North Dakota United responded in writing: 鈥淚 reached out to a teacher who I thought might be interested [in commenting], but she鈥檚 concerned about the potential risks of going on record about this legislation.鈥

The response didn鈥檛 come as a surprise to Shaye Stephens, the president of the Anderson Union High School Teachers Association, who said the school board president warned teachers that the district would 鈥渇ollow through with reprimanding teachers鈥 who failed to notify parents about their child鈥檚 expression of gender identity.

The district did not respond to Education Week鈥檚 requests for comment.

In her Facebook post, LaBarbera wrote that by sticking to its mandatory disclosure policy, the district was seeking to 鈥渕aintain and, in some cases, restore, trust鈥 between parents and schools, bring parents 鈥渋nto the decision-making process for mental health and social-emotional issues of their children at the earliest possible time in order to prevent or reduce potential instances of self-harm,鈥 and 鈥減romote communication and positive relationships with parent(s)/guardian(s) of pupils that promote the best outcomes for pupils鈥 academic and social-emotional success.鈥

However, Stephens said a union survey showed that most of the district鈥檚 teachers aren鈥檛 comfortable with contacting parents to inform them that their children have chosen to go by a different name or pronoun at school.

Teachers are mostly concerned with students鈥 safety, Stephens said.

鈥淚f we call home, or leave a voicemail message, or write a letter home within 72 hours of being made aware that a student is gender nonconforming, how do we ensure the safety of that student?鈥 she said. 鈥淭here鈥檚 a lot of situations where it鈥檚 not safe for kids to come out.鈥

Stephens said that she and her colleagues are left on their own to decide whether they should follow the new state law, when it goes into effect, or board policy. They鈥檙e also left to figure out for themselves how to have these conversations with parents, as Stephens said teachers in her district have not received any training on managing this sensitive communication.

School counselors acknowledge the challenges of managing sensitive student situations

Wendy Rock has a lot of experience managing sensitive situations involving students. She鈥檚 the ethics chair of the American School Counselor Association and a former high school counselor for nearly two decades in Louisiana. However, she acknowledges that, even as a trained counselor, handling sensitive student information isn鈥檛 straightforward.

While confidentiality is the foundation of counselors鈥 relationships with students, ethical guidelines make clear that in situations when there is serious and foreseeable harm at risk, such as when a student is considering suicide, counselors must break confidentiality and share that information with parents, she said.

Laws always supersede ethical standards involving student confidentiality, Rock explains. 鈥淚f there鈥檚 a school policy in conflict with our ethical standards, we have to follow the school policy,鈥 Rock said.

For counselors who work in a state that has implemented a 鈥渕andatory parental [gender] disclosure鈥 policy, this means they are beholden to the law鈥攁nd not a student鈥檚 request for privacy. In these instances, Rock said, one thing counselors can do is to use 鈥渋nformed consent,鈥 letting students know in advance that any sensitive information they share with counselors must, in turn, be shared with parents.

Counselors could help educators communicate with parents

Rock said she鈥檚 not aware of counselors being tapped to train teachers or other school personnel on how to have sensitive conversations with parents regarding their children鈥檚 gender identity, but suggests that their professional skills could provide some guidance.

Giving students some autonomy over the situation may be helpful, she suggests. That could involve talking first to the student and saying, 鈥淗ow do you want this to go?鈥 before making the call home.

鈥淐ounselors have these difficult conversations with parents all the time, not necessarily about coming out, but around other difficult topics,鈥 said Rock. 鈥淭hey know how to have these conversations without escalating potentially charged situations.鈥

Even so, some teachers remain skeptical. 鈥淚 do not think that we are the right people to be having those conversations with a parent or a guardian,鈥 Stephens said.

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